Putting Up a Fight…And Winning!

Well, so far.

A few weeks ago I blogged about how I was going on a diet. And the next day I went on said diet. And that same day I asked myself, “Self? Why did you go on this diet?” The day after that I seriously pondered the link between lack of carbs and homicide. But I kept going. And going. And going on phase 1 of the South Beach diet, which lets you have yummy things like lean protein and veggies and dairy (THANK GOD) and nuts and beans and blah blah blah no carbs blah no sugar blah blah what the hell am I going to eat blah blah etcetera.

At any rate, I kept chugging along. And what do you know?

It’s working! I’m down 6 pounds. I’ve actually been down 6 pounds for a couple weeks and have basically plateaued, but you know what? That’s okay, because I’ve lost 6 POUNDS!

Other interesting things to note: when I sneak a bite of something that’s not-so-healthy, I immediately feel it. As in, “wow that was good in my mouth but no me gusta in my stomach.” It seems that my body likes the good stuff I’m feeding it, and now that I’m feeding it 90% good stuff, the bad stuff sticks out even more. I’m surprised by this revelation because I felt like I was always going to have to battle against wanting to eat the crapola foods.

Of course, I say this having just snuck a piece of brownie. But I snuck JUST a piece. That was enough, and yeah, my body’s kind of eh about it. But my mouth? Looooved it.

The best part of all of this is that I’m starting to feel good about my body again. The second best part of all of this is that my co-workers are telling me how great I look. I’m still the same size I was before. I don’t think my body looks insanely different. But my clothes fit better and I’m definitely slimmer and the scale and I are really starting to mend our relationship.

So there it is, people. I’m winning the fight so far. You were all so lovely with your words of commiseration and encouragement that I had to update you.

And, may I submit into evidence this before (left) and after (right)? Both taken in work restrooms, I’m sorry to say. I wish I had a more beautiful backdrop but alas.

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I’m going to keep at it and fight the good fight. If any of you out there are dealing with the same thing (and I know you are!) I hope this encourages YOU, since you were all so wonderful about encouraging me.

9 thoughts on “Putting Up a Fight…And Winning!

  1. I have heard the siren call of “low carb” and “no carb” diets. My colleague has been on a pretty strict one for about 18 months and she’s lost around 100 pounds. Know what I do? I eat the carbs she won’t touch when buys lunch in cafeteria. Teamwork.

  2. You’re rocking it, Jess!!! I always try to up my exercise before I restrict my calories. BUT THERE ARE ONLY SO MANY HOURS IN THE DAY. Ho hum.

    • I would be a mess if I were restricting calories! I’m eating the same, just way better. I think cutting out soda helped exponentially. But yes, exercise would be awesome, too. That’s next on my (very long) list!

    • Ha! I am in phase 2 now, so the carbs are back! Just the good whole grain kind. I’m finding myself with more energy when I protein it up, but no carbs long-term is just not sustainable in my life. Thanks for the encouragement!

  3. Hey lovely Jess,

    I was debating commenting, but I feel that as someone who suffers from an eating disorder, it would be irresponsible of me not to. I completely understand (or at least my eating disorder does) the desire to be at a smaller weight, especially after you’ve gained a bit. But it just breaks my heart to hear that you’re uncomfortable in your own skin, even though you probably didn’t gain that much weight. I don’t know how much you did or what your weight is (and it’s none of my business), but the matter of the fact is that for health reasons, there is absolutely no reason why you would need to try to lose weight.

    And I’m just so sad at all this body hate and this culture of shame and fat talk. I get how great it feels when your co-workers tell you how great you look after you’ve lost a few pounds. But I strongly believe that we should never comment on someone’s weight loss or weight gain. I remember when I lost some weight, people would tell me how great I looked. And that fuelled my eating disorder. Did I look bad before? I could never go back to the weight I was before, because people would no longer think I looked great.

    Anyway, I could go on forever about this, but I just really hope that you can come to a place where you love your body as it is, and not worry about what you’re eating. Sure, it’s not the most nutritious to eat a million brownies a day, but there’s absolutely nothing wrong with eating a brownie.

    <3

    • Hi! Thanks for the input – sorry I didn’t respond sooner. I was out of town, but also wanted to make sure I came back to you with an equally thoughtful reply. 🙂

      I have been very slim my entire life. I know I’ve written about that before. After I had my little guy, I was still slim – like dropped the weight immediately and then some – but after I stopped nursing, I gained a lot of weight. 15 pounds’ worth, or close to. That probably doesn’t sound like a lot to most people, but for me it’s a lot. When I say I feel uncomfortable in my skin at my prior weight, I mean I literally feel uncomfortable. My clothes don’t fit correctly (and I’m not willing to invest in bigger sizes), I feel cumbersome, I feel kind of lethargic. Do I absolutely, 100% NEED to lose weight? For health reasons? No. But for comfort in my own body? Yes. I’m sure there are some subconscious media and social influences there, but at the end of the day I want to lose weight so that I feel good. It’s more about feel than look. I hope that makes sense.

      I also think I probably misrepresented my co-workers’ comments. I told them I was going on a diet – so they wouldn’t offer me the Cheetos and other junk food floating around there! – and they were interested in my progress. The “you look great!” comments stemmed from those conversations. They truly were just being supportive of my progress and the fact that I was bringing big, delicious salads back for lunch instead of Jimmy Johns. 🙂

      But I still occasionally get Jimmy Johns! I will have a brownie. This past weekend I had a lot of things I shouldn’t have, but I’m not beating myself up about it. I’m just getting back on the horse, because truly – really – my body feels better when I’m feeding it good stuff.

      Anyway, again, I really appreciate your comment, and you feeling comfortable enough to share your difficult experience with me. It definitely gives me some perspective and encourages me to be more gentle with myself when it comes to self-talk and loving who I am at any given moment!

  4. (I guess I should say that there’s no health reason that you should lose weight for any reason I can imagine, but I should never assume! I just meant it doesn’t look you’re at an unhealthy weight, by any stretch of the imagination.) 🙂

You’ve heard my thoughts! Would love to hear yours here.