I Can… But Then I Think Mmm, Better Not

Wait a minute, that’s not my manta. My mantra is I can and I will. It’s about Meridith power and how much I rock and how I can do anything. Kelly Clarkson sings about me being Stronger! Katy Perry wants to hear me ROAR!

merhair

Except that I’ve been thinking about this full marathon I signed up for and rather than being excited for it and looking forward to the training, I’ve been coming up with the reasons of why I should NOT do it.

The cons are totally outweighing the pros in my mental list and that can’t be a good sign. I’m assuming that in the history of running, I can’t be the only one who ever felt this way. Back in March, I listed reasons why I planned to sign up for the full.

Well, now here are my reasons that I’ve decided that now is not the time.

#1 My foot has actually been feeling GOOD

Confused? Let me explain! I spent a good seven months in pain thanks to plantar fasciitis and this little beauty.

heelspur

Seven months of wincing every time I got up in the morning out of bed. Seven months of hurting during and after every. Single. Run.

Slowly the pain faded away and I don’t think I even realized that it no longer hurt until a month of non-hurt. I was so accustomed to the hurt.

Now, I’m not hurting. And I don’t really want to mess that up.

6

#2 Training

Victoria and I have had this discussion more than once: you can’t fake a marathon. I mean, you probably could do it with minimal training (I’m sure that some people choose this option); I know I’d be downright miserable.

WHO WANTS TO BE MISERABLE? Not me! I like feeling good. Bring on the happy!

That’s not to say I haven’t been training. I have the Dumbo Double Dare at the end of this month and I’ve been having some great runs. Additionally I’m signed up for another 19.3 challenge in October (the Atlantic City Marathon series). Bumping up training runs to over 13 miles is where my issue lies.

Piggy-backing on the training point…

#3 I have other things that need to get done

My kiddos start school in September and both will be going full-day for the first time. In my delusional mind, I thought that this meant I’d have all the time in the world.

allthethings

But uh, I already know that’s not going to be the case. Marathon training is an all or nothing type of thing. I don’t think I can give it my all at this point – there are things I need to do (PTO, laundry, food shopping, dog training) and there are things that I want to do (volunteer work, seeing my friends, spending weekends with my family). Which brings me to point 4.

#4 I don’t want to and you can’t make me. But what’s more is that I can’t make me.

To quote High School Musical, “You’ve gotta get’cha head in the game”. To quote myself, “No.”

Zac Efron, you’re adorable but even you can’t talk me into this.

Seriously though, I have the most supportive friends and family. They were all about me signing up in April. Conversely, as soon as I started expressing doubts and concerns, they were just as supportive in the other direction. Mentally, I’m just not at the full marathon level. I might be able to physically push through but I don’t want to.

So fast, they were blurs. Literally.

Just look for me with the Elite runners.

 #5 There’s a half marathon option!

Oh Philly, you can’t get rid of me that easily. You were my first road race, first spectating experience and my first volunteering experiences and I adore you. I have yet to run the half during the Philadelphia Marathon weekend so let’s not cut corners!

Who will I see on November 23rd?

18 thoughts on “I Can… But Then I Think Mmm, Better Not

  1. Haha! Aww, I love the “no”. I am with your friends, and could throw support either direction. I think people who run fulls are insane.. I mean AMAZING! Insanely amazing! No seriously though- either way you are still going to run more than the average person. Do you, and if it isnt a marathon now, it might be one later!

    • Thanks so much, Ashley. You’re right, I’m doing good things for myself no matter what and while a marathon might not currently be in my cards, the future is always a possibility! I’m keeping a good attitude about it and not getting down on myself, there are so many good things I’ve got going for me!

  2. You already know that I stand by you no matter what you decide – and ultimately you know what works best for you. I totally get not wanting to risk re-injuring your foot just yet – you’re being smart and smart is strong!!

  3. Love the Pitch Perfect quote Mer! lol!!! I think you have to go where your mind is at. Training for a full is hard and starting when something isn’t right (be it your headspace or being injured or whatever), isn’t the best way to start because it takes the joy out of doing it. Trust me on this. I started my full training injured because I HAD to have a full under my belt before I turned 30. I finished it, but I was miserable the entire time.

    So yeah, go with your gut. Either way, we all support you and your running goals…and there is always another race…in fact, so many other races. 🙂 Good luck…no matter what you decide to do!

    • I’m so glad you said that, Lisa. I really don’t want to be a miserable wreak and I would ultimately like to finish in a respectable (for me) time. I have no delusions of BQing or anything like that but I don’t feel like I’m physically or mentally up for the challenge of 26.2! And maybe that will change as the months go by but I need to take things on a day by day basis at this point, you know? Thank you for your support – I always look forward to hearing what you think. xo

      • I think taking it day by day is the key. Sooner or later you will know if this is something you want to do or not. You will feel it in your gut, your bones, your head and most importantly, your heart! Good luck with your training, no matter the distance, Mer! I know you will be a success no matter what. 🙂

    • Thank you, Kristen! I’m looking forward to participating and doing the half – it’s seriously a favorite race of mine and I can’t wait actually RUN it!

  4. You’ve got to do what’s right for you. This may sound obvious, but you don’t want to run a marathon if you don’t want to run a marathon. If you try to talk yourself into doing it when you really don’t want to, the hard training will feel like a chore, and you’ll hate it.

    • I agree, Ben! And I don’t want to HATE running because I spent way too much time doing that when I was younger.

  5. That’s such a tough choice, but honestly marathons terrify me and I think I’d have to feel 100% ready going into one. Which is why I haven’t done one yet 🙂 Good luck making that choice though, and know that no matter what you do it’s going to be awesome!

    • Exactly! I need to be 100% too and since I’m NOT there yet, I think it’s wise to wait. xoxo

  6. I love this for multiple reasons, but really you won me over with the HSM quote and Zac! You are inspiring to me! Can’t wait to find out your choice. .

    • Thanks Destiny! I’m pretty sure I’m going with the half marathon option although I do want to see how I feel about it all after the Dumbo Double Dare in Disneyland at the end of this month. Maybe I’ll be inspired!

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