[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UI-ZteQ8JGU&w=853&h=480]
Going off of this awesome idea, I (Mer – waves from behind the Scoot a Doot curtain) asked the Chicks what they’d like to hear more and less of in 2014, either from themselves or others.
More:
“I’ll do what I can, when I can, with what I’m given.” This is a reminder for work and life. I’m hard on myself when I can’t complete a task on deadline, make a mistake or can’t travel to see a loved one. I need to remember that I can’t do it all.
“I can and I will.” I’ve adopted Meri’s mantra. Fortunately, she likes to share! I repeat it several times a week. But could certainly use it far more. Having a bad day? Need a reminder or an affirmation? It fits the bill all around.
“Please,” “thank you” and “you’re welcome” People don’t say these words enough. Such small words mean so much to so many people.
Less:
“You should have…” Don’t focus on what went wrong, instead focus on what you can do to make a situation better.
“I can’t do it.” You CAN do it. If you believe it, and put on the work, you can do anything. If you tell yourself you can’t, you won’t.
Gangnam style (’nuff said)
More:
“I volunteer…” (not as tribute, for what it’s worth) aka “How can I help?” I work with a lot of volunteer based organizations and I can say this with much certainty – we always need MORE help. When people readily volunteer, come to the table with ideas, and make things happen it’s always a welcomed and happy event!
“It’s all good!” Pete the Cat says this in my kiddo’s book and my variation on it is “No worries.” Positive attitudes make things so much more pleasant.
Less:
“I have to do laundry now.” Sadly, I don’t think I’ll be saying this less. But maybe I could get on more of a schedule so it doesn’t feel like I’m doing it all the time, every day.
“I can’t…” after someone has committed that they CAN, the last thing that I want to hear is that they can’t. It’s important to know ones limitations but good planning makes the phrase less said (on my part and on others).
More:
“What can I do to help?” In my house and in my volunteer commitments – and I’d like to be better about accepting help when it’s offered.
“Let’s play!” My kids are growing up, and with half of kindergarten completed by my oldest, I know we will continue to be busier and busier (and busier). Between school, homework, play dates and our scheduled activities like dance class, I want to take more time for unstructured free play with my littles. Every day.
“No, I can’t do that.” Like Meri, I volunteer for quite a bit. This year, I’d like to learn how to say no. That I don’t have to be in charge of everything, every time.
Less:
Yelling. I pray for more patience every day and hope I’m getting stronger. As a parent, I’m still learning how to stop and take a breath before I react- and I need to keep working on that.
More:
“Here, let me get the door for/do that for/help you.” Any of these combinations is a win. I try to do one nice thing for someone I don’t know per day, whether it’s as simple as holding a door open or buying someone less fortunate a coffee. When we reach out to people like that, we make a connection, however fleeting. That simple gesture might make someone’s day!
“I understand where you’re coming from.” Even if you don’t agree with it, understanding where someone’s coming from goes a long way. Unless that place is somewhere incredibly stupid and close-minded, of course.
“Thank you!” Two words. So simple. Easy to say and extremely valuable.
Less:
People glued to their phones. This includes myself. You miss so much when you’re staring at your screen. Put it down, look around, have a conversation!
Also, no more mention of twerking. Please.
More:
“You’re right.” Admitting when I’m wrong is one of my non-strengths. While I’ve gotten marginally better at using the phrase “I’m sorry”, “you’re right” seems to elude my vernacular.
“I can’t.” I know what you’re thinking…shouldn’t this be I CAN? That’s not a typo. Sometimes saying no is just as important as saying yes.
“I’ll do it now.” I’m the best at procrastinating and I have a terrible memory. When I put things off, I usually forget about them.
Less:
“I hate.” I need to be a bit more careful in proclaiming my hatred of things, especially things that I don’t actually hate or even really care about.
“I’m starving.” I’ve never actually been starving a day in my life. There are people in this world who are without and it’s a huge disrespect to stand in my stocked kitchen and think that I am starving.
“Fatass.” This is my favorite way to slam myself. Negative self-talk is poison.
“I know.” It’s no secret, I’m a know-it-all. I don’t mean to be, I just listen to a lot of NPR and watch a lot of documentaries. When someone brings up a topic I have some knowledge in, I want to discuss! And sometimes in an argumentative style. While I think a respectful argument can be quite thrilling, sometimes it’s just as thrilling to listen.
More:
“I can/I did.” I may not be able to do everything. I may just NOT do things. But I will focus on what I can do, and what I have done. This is how progress is made.
“You inspire me.” Far to often, the people who inspire us have not idea that they are doing it. A while back, a friend of mine wrote a guest post about how I had inspired her. I was shocked! And touched. So, the people who are my inspirations? Get ready to hear all about it.
“You’re beautiful.” To myself. Because I need to hear it. From me.
Less:
“I can’t/I didn’t” These have been my mantras for far too long. I can’t stick to a diet plan. I didn’t prepare for this race I’m about to run. I can’t be the person I want to be. We have have things we can’t do, things we didn’t do, but these have been my constant state. No more.
“Let’s hang out soon.” This is something I find myself saying a lot, but not acting on nearly often enough. The internet makes it easier to connect with people, even if you don’t see them. But there is a lot to be said for a nice, old-fashioned, sit down conversation. I want more of those. And really, less phone/internet in general is a personal goal for me this year. A favorite author of mine tweeted something a while back. “What if, for my birthday, I gave myself a year off from the internet?” I was both horrified and in love with the idea. So, while NO internet isn’t a reality for me, LESS internet and MORE face to face interaction sounds fabulous. Want to come over?
“Let’s work on being healthier.” This is me, around my house, all the time. Lots of talk about changes to make us healthier as a family. But, it seems to me, the more we talk about it, the less we do about it. It’s time to stop talking about change and start implementing it. I don’t have to say ‘we’re going to have less junk in the house’ to have less junk in the house.
So now it’s your turn! What do you think we should say more of in 2014? Less of?
More “Love Yourself” — love your body, mind, spirit, heart. Set aside “me” time to reflect, reset and relax 🙂
Less “I can’t, I won’t, I don’t know how”
🙂
Those are great ones, Karen. I definitely need to focus on “me” time as well – the more relaxed/grounded we are the more positive energy we are able to put forth! 🙂
Loved Cam’s “I’m starving” one! Such a good point.
For me, more of “What are you doing tonight?” since I never go out and always stay home. And maybe less of “I feel gross” because I want to be (a) taking better care of my body and (b) not being myself up so much when I fall off the wagon.
<3 you all
We love you too, Lisa! I like the idea of getting out more too – social interaction with people in PERSON? Crazy talk, I know. xo
Loved all of them! Cam’s “I’m starving” is a daily thought / lesson…
I think mostly I want to work on saying to other people “It’s ok” or “Don’t worry about it” instead of being driven by the first erratic emotion that works its way right out of my mouth. This pertains to my life as a parent and my life as a friend / person at large. I also want to hear more “I’m good enough” from myself. (I’m a good enough mom. I’m a good enough wife. I’m a good enough runner. I’m a good enough person). I don’t mean in it in a way that I am giving up at striving for better…I just mean it in a way of being more forgiving and NOT so hard on myself at every turn. So, yeah.
Oh, and just for the record…I love all y’all and HAPPY NEW YEAR!!
We love you too Megan!!! Happy almost 2014 (dude, this year flew by, didn’t it?)
Okay, so I love the “I’m good enough…” mantra. Because all too often we are hard on ourselves and we are doing kick ass things. So rather than focusing on negativity or self doubt, focusing on the positive and how much we are accomplishing is always a good thing! And trust me, you are a good person! Here’s to many more good things to come in 2014.
What a great way to look at it. =)
Thanks Betsy! Good thoughts and happiness for you in 2014.
First, I love you all and you’re all freaking amazing and beautiful.
Second, the holding the door, I’m all about. This week I held the door for a family at a rest-stop. They went through, nothing. But a man was right behind them so I held it for him too. He not only thanked me, but went on a tirade about people not knowing how to be polite anymore and he was sick of it. Me too! I want more politeness. Both from myself, and from others.
Third, I’d like less focus on what I “need”. I need almost nothing. I certainly don’t need any stuff, and need to be more focused on not buying for the sake of buying or to show off something new. Not that I can’t ever buy new stuff in 2014, but instead I’d like to focus on experiencing things and enjoying what I have.
Awwww, thanks Cyanne! We think that you are pretty kick ass too! 🙂
More politeness is always a good thing. There really can never be too much of it, right? And I feel like in this day and age, where we are so focused on ourselves, our phones, or just living within our own thoughts, we lose some of that connection. Eye contact is a beautiful thing! I think in cities in particular, it’s easy to be in the “zone” because you’re taught to stay to yourself, not to connect. And it’s a shame because look at how much we miss out on!
I really like not focusing on materialistic things and those “needs” that are more like “wants”. It’s not always easy but it is important!