Tag Archives: motherhood

Couch to Spring

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YOU GUYS, IT’S SPRING. I seriously could not be happier. This was a long, LONG winter. Between snowstorms and colds (and my crazy schedule the last few weeks), I’m not quite as far along as I thought I’d be. Well, my week off for illness turned into two weeks off (mostly illness, a little bit of lazy thrown in for good measure). But this week, it was time to get back on the horse. Or my feet.

C25K, Week 3, Day 1

Time 28:00 minutes, Distance 1.44 miles, Pace 19:27

Having taken two full weeks off, I was seriously scared to get back on the treadmill. I contemplated going back a week because, as those of us that C25K know, Week 3 means a 3 minute run. YIKES. But, I decided to just pick up where I left off and do what I could.

And it was good! Hit the gym with my daughter after her modeling class. I was tired and could have easily bailed, but Kay is my little Jillian and she was having none of that. While my pace wasn’t my best so far (about 20 seconds more per mile than where I left off), it was a good run. And I even pushed myself a little. Towards the end, I felt like I had some more run in me, so I did an extra two minutes!

Kay

My beautiful (hardass) baby girl.

C25K, Week 3, Day 2

Time 28:00 minutes, Distance 1.50 miles, Pace 18:40

God, I love when my pace number goes down. I really do. Before I started running, I didn’t even know what a ‘good’ pace was, much less that I would grow to care about my own and want to better it. I bumped up my treadmill pace and did the extra two minutes again, just to see it go down a little.

The feeling of being ‘a runner’ as opposed to someone who runs is starting to come back. And I’m not going to lie…

I LOVE THAT.

C25K, Week 3, Day 3

Time 28:08 minutes, Distance 1.69 miles, Pace 16:37

Yeah, I'm just a little proud.

Yeah, I’m just a little proud.

16:37! Picture me doing a little happy dance on the track. Because that’s a big drop from 18:40 just a few days before.

This was my first outdoor run of the year. I looked out the window and say the shining sun and the clear blue sky and thought ‘why on Earth would I want to go into the gym on a day like this?’

Of course, this being New England, it wasn’t quite as warm as it looked. But it was warm. 44 degrees warm.

Spring

The sky has gotten the message that Spring is here, and so have I. The trees, not so much.

I headed down to the local track and took off. I’d forgotten how much more I enjoy running outside. No ‘hamster on a wheel’ feeling. Even though a track is a big circle, I feel like I’m going somewhere. And I don’t get any funny looks from fellow treadmillers when my Pandora starts blasting the dirty version of What’s Your Fantasy (which, btw, is an excellent running song).

But, I had also forgotten that I’m a faster runner outside. When I run on the treadmill, it paces me. I get all worked up by the speed and think ‘I can’t increase it, I’m not ready yet’.  Outside, I pace me. I run as fast as I am comfortable with, and I don’t look at the number on my phone.

I just run.

I’m certainly not alone out there, either. There was a little old woman running in pink sweats and a sunhat, a couple of teenage boys, some families out for a walk. And more so than when I run at the gym, I feel like part of something bigger when I run outside.

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My local track.

See that track? This is where I run. This is where I better myself, as a runner and as a person. This is where I become the athlete I want to be.

So, tomorrow, I start Week 4. Which includes a 5 minute run. I’m scared, but excited. And I’ll tell you all about it next Saturday 🙂

<3 Bec

P.S. On the Dietbet front, I’m down 10 pounds in just under two weeks, which means unless I get assaulted by Ben & Jerry, I should make it!

Back to Life, Back to Reality

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I’ve been living in a cocoon for the past three and a half months. A cozy little world with me and Bug and sometimes Mister Jess, if we let him in (we usually do). All of that will be changing come Monday, however. I’ll be breaking out of my self-imposed swaddle* and getting back into the swing of things.

Namely, work. Real life. The grind, if you will.

I’ve had a lot of time to think about this day, but in those first few weeks, April 1st seemed like a lifetime away. I was knee-deep in onesies, pacifiers, and diapers, with a newborn barnacled to my boob. I wasn’t thinking about work or “real life.” I definitely wasn’t thinking about running or any kind of me time. I was thinking about surviving. I was thinking about that elusive thing called sleep. I was thinking, “this shit is hard!”

The past few weeks I’ve been mentally preparing myself to get back to it all, though. I’m thinking about how on Monday, I’ll have to give Bug to his caregiver and walk away from him. How I’ll have to go to work and start critically thinking again and conversing with adults. A novel concept, considering I’ve been either talking to my baby or talking about my baby since he was born in December. What are these multi-syllabic words? 

I’ve also been thinking about how easy it is to settle into a new routine, and how hard it is to break away from it, especially when that “routine” is a living, breathing human who is growing and getting more fascinating by the day. I’ve been struggling with how to feel about getting back to “real life,” because this part of my life, the little cocoon, has been very, very real.

But when I found myself staring wistfully at runners as they passed us by during a trip to Crissy Field this week, I realized that running is a part of that real life. And that all of it – working, running, being a person independent of my son – is something I need to get back to. Running clears my mind. It lets me focus on becoming stronger, better. That time is mine alone, and if you have kids, you know how important that time is. You savor it. I know that it will be even more important to me now than it was before. Like Brooke said in her last post, if mama’s happy, everybody’s happy.

Part of me is sad maternity leave is ending. Part of me is scared. And part of me is excited to get back to some of the other things that fulfill me and make me a healthy, well-rounded chick.

And so although I’ve willingly – gladly – given up a piece of myself to my son (and basically my entire heart. Sorry, Mister Jess), I’m looking forward to taking back a piece for me. It’s time to get back on the road.

Hit the road, Jess.

Hit the road, Jess.

Working parents, how do you find a balance between kid time and healthy-you time? Give me some tips in the comments! 

*All credit for this sentence goes to Meri, who came up with the brilliant phrase “breaking out of your swaddle.” Baby jokes, haha!

If Mama’s Happy, Everyone’s Happy

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It’s Spring Break here in sunny Florida, which means I haven’t exercised in a week. We’ve been to a hockey game, the zoo, an Easter egg hunt, painted pottery and there’s still a lot of excitement ahead (including having a friend sleepover for the first time. Eeeep.) but it probably won’t include a trip to the gym for me until the end of the week.

Each night, I’ve planned to go at 6am the next day-I’ve even laid out my clothes- but then the baby is up at 1 and 3 and 5, and my youngest girl wakes at 6, and it’s time for Spring Break Entertainment. And coffee. Obviously. That’s okay though. I’m not very happy about it, but I’ve accepted it. And the kids and I are having a great time together.

That said, I still have plans to work out with my trainer on Friday morning. We meet for an hour at my community gym, and I bring the little dude with me. (He sleeps in his stroller.) Bringing the girls will be…interesting. There is a playroom with windows, so I’ll be able to see them, but they’ll also be somewhat unsupervised. Which could mean some not-so-friendly sibling playtime, you know? I feel a little anxious about that.

Crunching in my neighborhood gym. The playroom (and sleeping baby) are nearby!

Crunching in my neighborhood gym. The playroom (and sleeping baby) are nearby!

I also feel guilty about bringing them with me. I tell myself I’m being silly. I think nothing of running with them in the BOB for an hour, or stroller walking with friends, and this is basically the same thing, right? And how is this different from me doing an hour of cleaning while they play in their own playroom? But those feelings are still there. So much so that I’m considering just canceling. I guess I feel that it’s their time with me, their break, and we should be having loads of fun the entire time.

One of my Facebook friends posted something last week about mommy guilt and exercise. She said that she’d feel guilty letting her kids watch her live a sedentary lifestyle, rather than watching her make time to stay fit. That taking care of herself makes her feel confident and happy, and then she’s a more positive influence on everyone else in her life. Regular exercise makes her a better mom, so she’s let go of the guilt.

Isn’t that an awesome perspective? Of all the things we mamas feel bad about, should maintaining a healthy lifestyle, even if it cuts into their time with us, be one of them?

Meri and I have talked a lot about setting a healthy example for our kids, and she’s also said that they regularly ask about her running. My friend Sara recently ran her first marathon, and the thought of showing her kids what could be achieved with hard work really motivated her during her training. My own kids love to do yoga with me and one of their favorite games is to pretend to race each other in our driveway.

My girls practicing yoga. In costume, natch.

My girls practicing yoga. In costume, natch.

We’re all definitely influencing our kids- but how much exercising is happening on their time? For me? Not much.

I think I like this new attitude much better. I need running. It makes me feel good. It calms me in a way that nothing else does. It’s also going to help me fit into my old pants again. While I’m not ready to bring the kids to the gym for every workout, or even every week, I’m going to try not to stress about bringing them once in a while. An hour of their time is definitely worth a happier, more focused mom.

Parents, do you bring your kids with you when you work out? How do you make it work? When is your Spring Break? Anything fun planned?

I hate running… Wait, no, I love running!

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I’m going to let you in on a terribly kept little secret.

Sometimes, more often than I care to admit, I don’t like running. In fact, I don’t use the H word often but I might have said that I’ve *hated* running once or twice.

I’m sorry, I’m sorry; Please don’t shun me from the runner’s club!

I say it’s terribly kept because I’ve got no qualms telling anyone who asks what I truly think about running. My relationship with running has always been tumultuous. In fact, the “it’s complicated” status would be what I’d use to describe us (you know, if Facebook wanted to know the nitty gritty details of me and running).

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Cam, Me and Vic before my first race ever (smiles can be deceiving – I was terrified.)

It’s just that, well, there are some days that I’m quite reluctant to run. Once I’m moving, the reluctantly usually subsides, but the motivation to get going is a challenge. I always wind up doing it because I’m fairly driven, but I understand and sympathize with people who say to me “I don’t know how you do it.” Because, honestly, there are days when I’m not sure myself how I do it.

I just do.

I run on the treadmill more than I run on the road, because that’s what currently fits in my life. And also because I feel like when I run outside, people are judging me. The rational part of me knows otherwise but the scared girl who walked around the track in high school instead of running the mile doesn’t want to look foolish.

For years I said those four words that so many people say: I’m not a runner. I had a million reasons why I wasn’t a runner. My knees. My body type. My genetics. It’s Thursday. I don’t run unless I’m being chased.

But the real reason I wasn’t a runner?

Because it’s HARD.  Running is a challenge, physically demanding and it occasionally hurts.  I remember asking Vic if it gets easier and I think she told me that it does. Or at least that’s what I want to believe she told me because I’m still waiting for that to happen.

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Injuries after my first 5k (which happened to be a mud run).

Maybe one day?

I sign up for races because I know that it will encourage me to train consistently. I have moments of greatness with running. They usually happen while I’m running alone with my ear buds in and I lose myself in the run.  Like I said, it doesn’t happen often but I’m constantly searching for those moments of greatness because I know they exist, the almost mythical creature that shows up just when you start thinking that maybe you imagined the entire thing.

I get a great sense of accomplishment that I’m running. It’s mine, and I don’t have to be the fastest or the best. I’m a non-competitive person by natural, at least where athletics is concerned. So when it comes to running, it’s enough for me that I’m actually doing it, after 34 years of not doing it. I don’t beat myself up (too much) if I don’t hit a PR goal or get upset if I’m 62 out of 67 in my age group. I’ll take it because the fact that I’m participating is what matters most of all.

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Let’s get back to those moments of greatness. Lately, they’ve been showing up more, little glimmers that remind me why I do this (other than the health benefits). Maybe I’m actually figuring out this running stuff a bit more. Maybe I’m improving as a runner and therefore I’m seeing them more and it’s all related.

Maybe I actually like running.  A little bit.

Okay, fine.  A lot.

I can and I will.

Do you find yourself falling more and more in love with running every day?  Or is your relationship status “it’s complicated” too? Do you run to race or to say you’ve done it?

With A Little Help From My Friends

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Do you work out best if you have a goal in mind? I know I do! I love exercising, but without a race waiting, it’s very easy for me to skip a run in favor of curling up with a book or sleeping (something I rarely get to do these days. Take a nap for me, okay?).

Last week, I registered for Disney’s Wine and Dine Half-Marathon. This nighttime race was my first half, back in 2011, so it’s fitting that it will (most likely) be my first half post- my cute baby boy’s arrival.

So, my goal is set. Great! But this race isn’t until November, which seems SO FAR AWAY. The little dude, who hasn’t even rolled over yet, will be almost a year old by then. It’s easy for me to crave time at the gym right now; I still have baby weight to lose. I’m also working on building a base for training. But staying on track until I begin a formal training plan feels incredibly daunting. It’s hot in Florida. I need a nap. All of my kids will be home every day this summer. There are piles of books on my nightstand. And did I mention my lack of sleep?

I want to know what gets you into the gym each day. As I’ve mentioned before, I meet a friend a few times a week to work out. That keeps me accountable for fitting it in, and I get to chat with her for an hour. (If you are a mama, you know that’s a luxury.) I have another sweet friend who lets me tag along on her runs when I can, even though she’s in marathon shape and I’m far from it.

My Facebook feed is all fitness (and babies, natch), all the time. Not surprising, considering I follow a pair of CrossFit gym owners, a Zumba instructor, a handful of personal trainers, a bikini competitor, and a bunch of runners, including my Scootadoot chicks. I have some fit friends! (Are you friends with us on Facebook yet?) When I check in each morning, at least one person has already posted about their daily workout, and I think, “If they’re getting their fitness on, then so can I.” I actually decided to run my first half-marathon because I saw someone post on Facebook about their experience.

Another way I connect with runners online is through Daily Mile. I joined the site last January because I wanted to see how many miles I had run by the end of the year. After a while, I discovered that it wasn’t just an easy way to track my training, it also allowed me to see what my friends were doing, and cheer them along, too. (It also tells me how many donuts I’ve worked off, which is sort of the same as saying, “Brooke, you can eat THIS MANY donuts.” *fist pump*)

Isn’t social media great for fitness? I’m excited to start training for my race. Until then, I’ll be logging my miles on the treadmill, on Daily Mile, and talking about it here, with all of you.

Are you training for any races right now? What gets you into the gym each day? Do you use social media to track your progress and chat with others? What’s your favorite kind of donut? Let me know in the comments.

The kids are watching… and that’s a good thing!

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“Momma, there are people running outside! Look at them run so fast!”

My kids genuinely get excited when they see people running on our street.  They press their little faces up against the window and they watch.  They watch the older gentleman on his daily jog, shuffling along.  We live close to a high school and college, so they closely watch as the teams make their rounds. They watch the couple that runs together on the weekends, the woman always a couple of paces ahead of the man.  They watch the young girl and her dog.

They watch.

My kids are your cheerleaders, as well as mine.  You might not hear them from inside my house (actually, it’s quite possible you do; they’re loud and I’m sure their noise transcends time and space) but they’re there, cheering and watching. Everyone is fast to them. And everyone is doing a terrific job in their eyes.

These kids of mine know that sometimes it’s hard work getting out the door to run. They see it in their own home every day and they always ask us, “Did you run today? What did you do at the gym?” The older one truly wants an answer, while the little one just wants you to pick him up, despite the sweatiness.

They’re inspired without knowing the word to put with the emotion.  They’re motivated to run.  To run fast.  To feel free.  Because when other people are running, their natural inclination is to want to run too.

On our Saturday run at the park. For the record, we both wear Road IDs, even when we are running together.

On our Saturday run at the park. For the record, we both wear Road IDs, even when we are running together.

Pace, stride and time mean nothing to them.  Eye of the Tiger is their favorite song (and I’m Sexy and I Know It -much to my dismay- because hearing an eight and three year old singing that is wrong) and they both can belt it while running with no issues. They run around the house, around the yard, around any open space.  Because obviously, open spaces are made for running.

Before I started running, we would point out planes or diggers on car rides. Now? It’s always runners.

Do you play the game in the car of thinking how far things are in relation to your house and how long it would take you to run there? (Or am I the only one? I don’t think I am!) My elder son actually asked me how long I thought it would take to run to the grocery store the other day… and then lamented it probably wasn’t a good idea because “how could we run home with all the groceries?”

I absolutely adore it.  I love that he’s thinking this way and wondering these things, just as I am. Running has made me feel a part of a community, a fraternity of like-minded individuals, my kids are legacies and they want to be a part of it just as much.  If there’s anything I know, it’s that my husband and I are doing right by them by committing ourselves to being healthy and active.

The truth is there are days that I probably wouldn’t choose to run… except that I know they’re watching and they’re cheering for me. So I do.

2012 Mother's Day 5k

2012 Mother’s Day 5k

Keep on running, friends. And know that my children are cheering for you and think that you are number one, whether you’re running in our neighborhood or across the country, just because you’re out there and you’re moving.  And I do, too.

Making It Work (Out)

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I had grand plans for prenatal exercise. I had a good running base. I’d done my research, talked to my doctor and read some blogs about running during pregnancy. I didn’t need to run a marathon on the day I gave birth or anything; I just wanted to maintain some level of running fitness. It should’ve been easy.

Ha.

You know what’s easier? Sitting around and having your husband bring you ice cream. Because you are fat and hot and tired and nauseated and taking care of two pre-schoolers all day.

I started out fine- not my typical mileage but still doing something. I even ran a 5k. But then, first trimester exhaustion arrived, along with her friends, nausea and bloat. So I walked when I felt like it and figured I’d get back to running in the second trimester. By then summer had arrived, and between the heat and the flurry of pool dates, zoo trips, picnics, and whatever else I could think of to entertain the girls, I was just too tired to work out. I resigned myself to the fact that my pregnancy running plans were a complete fail. (And I was mostly okay with that. I mean, I still had ice cream.)

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Nursing while I warm-up! Moms know
how to multitask.

I’m three months post-pregnancy, and I’m finally getting back to running on a regular schedule. It feels SO GOOD. But also? Running is hard! I’m challenged by speeds that would’ve been slow for me before, and distances that were a piece of cake. And finding the time? Very tricky.

I used to run after the kids were in bed. That doesn’t work right now. Nor does early morning because little dude’s feedings aren’t consistent. Both girls are in school during the latter half of the week, so after I drop them off, I head to the gym.

My goal right now is to run three days a week. So far, I’ve only made this happen once. But I’m still exercising! Here’s how I’m making it work, as I adjust to being a mom of three:

  • Go to the gym when wee precious babe is asleep: Little dude is an easy baby. I nurse him, put him in the stroller and hop on the treadmill. After we smile and make some silly faces, he usually gets bored with watching me run and shuts his eyes.
  • Meet a friend to work out: If I plan to meet a friend for a workout, I’m obligated to be there. No excuses. As a bonus, there’s an extra person around to entertain the baby, if needed. Also? I get to converse with an adult.
  • Hire a trainer: I’m working out once a week with Trainer Jen! When we started, I said I needed her to help me avoid a tummy tuck. We do lots of ab exercises, among other things.
  • Walk, walk, walk: If I haven’t made it to the gym, I take the kids out for a stroller or bicycle walk.
  • Find something to do at home: Sometimes I only have twenty minutes. I can totally do some abs and arm work with free weights in that amount of time.
  • Don’t be too hard on yourself: There are times when I’m too tired. There are times when the baby won’t let me put him down. There are times when I don’t want to put him down, because one day, he won’t fall asleep in my arms. And that’s okay. The treadmill will be there tomorrow.

Moms, did you run during your pregnancy? Any tips for finding time to workout with kids? Let me know in the comments.